No matter what your personality profile, the writing life can be a hard road. Long hours alone, staring at a blank screen in the beginning of a project, then a screen overwhelmed by words you’ve seen so many times you’re going blind near the end. Writing well requires attention to detail, emotion, plot, character and (not least) language. It means functioning on many levels at once, while drawing everything from inside yourself to put on the page.

For an extrovert like me, this can be even more challenging. Extroverts (in general) are people whose primary way of being in the world tends to focus outside themselves. Extroverts get their energy from interaction with lots of other people, while introverts are more likely to refuel with time alone or in very small groups. BTW, it’s a common misconception that extroverts love people and introverts don’t — the difference is about energy, not a like or dislike of other people. Extroverts can be malicious hotheads as well as social butterflies, introverts can be deeply loyal friends as well as shrinking violets.

Extroverts tend to process things aloud — or on paper — and we often have a hard time stopping until we feel we have reached resolution, however messy or melodramatic that might be. And then we’re on to the next thing as though this one never happened.  This is unlike introverts, who may prefer to process things quietly on their own sweet time, and might be reticent to share their thoughts until they feel they’re more fully fleshed out.

At first blush, the solitary, detail-focused vocation of writing seems ill-suited to the stimulation junkie personality of an extrovert. In fact, I’d love to do a study of this trait among narrators and main characters in the literary canon. I’d venture to guess that the overwhelming majority are introverts — maybe because introverts are simpler to write, or maybe because they reflect the personality styles of their authors. Introverts may self-select into this profession by nature, because they are better suited to writing (and finishing) long pieces.

For a while, I was so discouraged by this idea that I even gave up on the serious pursuit of professional writing myself, because I didn’t think I could handle all the time alone and trying to draw so much energy from within. Since then, I’ve learned that I can handle far more than I thought possible. And I have learned a thing or two about how an extrovert can be a writer. Here is some of what works for me; maybe it will help others as well:

• Find people time. My emotional gas tank gets filled being around people. Whenever I sit down to write, I’m spending that fuel, so I include social time in my self-care routine to fill it back up. I also still do some consulting and coaching work, which gives me a chance to flex my social muscles in a work setting.
• Share your work. I also try to bring others into my writing process at various stages and develop professional and semi-professional relationships – my friends, my beta readers, my proofreader, my critique group. The servers at my favorite coffee shop.  Some people are very protective of their work and don’t like to bring others in on it. I’m the opposite – I work better when I can share my ideas, and when there are other voices and energies around. The small risk that someone will steal my work is far outweighed by the benefit of support and encouragement.
• Picture the readers. Yeah, I’m alone when I write, but I try to vividly imagine how others will react when they read a particular scene or line of dialogue. Sometimes I think of specific people in my life, other times I just visualize happy readers, good reviews, or someone waking up her significant other with laughter at 3 a.m.
• Make real connections with characters. I love it when people say that my characters feel real to them, because that’s my first goal when I write. I am energized and fascinated by people, so I try to write characters who will energize and fascinate others, and who feel real to me. Sometimes, as with Rebecca in BAGGAGE CHECK, I have to channel my understanding of introverts to do this well. Good thing I’ve known one or two. 🙂
• Get help with the detail work. Once I’ve done all the emotionally juicy, socially gratifying parts of writing, there is still a tremendous amount of work to do. This is a place where introverts have the advantage, with their low-idle staying power, and I’m the first to admit it. Knowing this helps, so I can give myself extra time and balance out the detail work with lots of fun, extroverted activities in other places in my life. I also rely on others to help  me with this stage.
• Use your extroverted super powers. As an extrovert, you probably understand way more than you realize about social interaction and human nature. Tap into your intuition about people to pull out realistic character traits, dialogue, and emotional exchanges. Introverts can have great intuition about people too, of course, but this is an area they might find more energy-draining than energy-giving.
• Use your friends. (In a nice way.) With our flitting from person to person and our tendency to “collect” people, we extroverts often understand a little bit about a lot of things, rather than a super-deep knowledge of one thing. That means we might have to spend more time researching things we don’t know about, but it also means we probably know someone who is an expert at most things. So helpful, especially when you’d rather learn about something over a plate of chili fries than on the internet.

So there you have it, for me at least. If you are in the Atlanta area and want to practice socializing with me in person, come hang out at my book launch Wednesday night!

MJ Pullen

M.J. Pullen is a distracted writer and the mom of two boys in Roswell, Georgia, where she is absolutely late for something important right now. Her books include quirky romantic comedies and playful women's fiction. She blogs erratically with writing advice, random observations, and reflections on raising very loud kids and dogs. Join her Distracted Readers newsletter list for updates, free content, giveaways and more.